Assalamualaikum and hi!.
Since aku duduk sorang dalam rumah ni whereby semua housemates lain keluar pi tengok wayang(and aku jenis yang tak tengok wayang haha) makanya, mehlah kita update blog sebentar.
Alhamdulillah we made it into year 4. And currently tengah Forensic Medicine posting kat faculty medic Kota Samarahan. Being able to balik ke Kota Samarahan feels so good. Yelah, dekat setahun tak balik faculty sini sejak masuk year 3 yang mana we have to stay kat City Campus, tengah Kuching.
They are some that couldnt make it into year 4, please do pray for them. And im praying that mereka ditabahkan hati, dipermudahkan urusan. it's hard but you have more chance to learn more, insyaAllah. Medicine, Surgery, O&G and CMPH. really tough. but i never failed to think of you, throughout the postings.
And, please do pray that me and my friends able to pass with flying colours throughout year 4 ni. 10 posting, kau tahu.. boleh separuh meninggal aku. eheh. Hope able to survive this year 4. Allahumma amiin.
Entahlah, aku rasa macam takde point pulak nak tulis ni. hmm. chau lah dulu. bye!
Love,
Sha
Wednesday, July 24, 2019
Monday, April 8, 2019
Ilmu
Entah kenapa, kagum aku terhadap mereka yang berpenat lelah sebab menuntut ilmu. sampaikan takde 'me time' pun.
Balik kali ni, i just found out that yati is currently taking occupational safety health course, 4 months. Class on weekdays, weekend balik UPM, class untuk her masters. Yang comelnya, yati sama kelas dengan cousin ktorang, mok ma. Dahlah dalam kelas duduk sekali, depan sekali 😂
Sebab abang aku dah officer, senanglah kakak aku nak masuk bidang OSH bila dah habis belajar nanti.
Sometimes, i do jealous of other people, sibukkan diri tahap gaban despite their pack schedule. When you’re busy, sedikitlah masa untuk berlagha.
Dan lagi insan yang buat aku kagum sangat, are my parents. Since past few years, weekend je pergi kelas mengaji kat masjid negeri. Under MUIP. That’s why pattern of my family changed.. dulu we used to spend our weekend kat kedai buku pollpular. But now, no longer.
After ayah cmpleted diploma dulu, azam ayah untuk belajar tak terhenti lagi. ayah selalu ceritakan lepas dah kahwin, ayang sambung degree kat UITM Jengka. It was a rough times, back then. Alhamdulillah, ayah made it into his degree in business studies.
Abang chor also planned to pursue his master studies dalam OSH.. I remember when he completed his diploma, he was kinda unstable. but i see his hardwork. he masuk kursus tu, ini, kena hantar kerja contract ke Penang bagai.. Gambang..Muadzam..Johor. Tapi among our siblings, dialah paling banyak $$
Lepas raya nanti, yah ada exam.. Cert for accountancy something like that, aku tak bertanya lanjut pun, segan. Just wanna say, my parents, my siblings, are my ultimate idols..
The thing is, im kinda miss my abang. Last time jumpa dia last november, he’s seem to be struggling very hard. What’s app pun lambat reply. Nanti ye sambung master, pjj.. makin susahlah aku nak jumpa dia. Dia ni dah nak masuk 3 series.. aku harap dia tak lupa untuk kahwin.. Bestnya kalau ada anak buah lagi..
Ans i'm missing my adik.. doakan my adik pass with flying colours for her foundation in law exam.. and dapat masuk Uni yang dia harapkan untuk sambung law degree.. Allahumma amiin..
Balik kali ni, i just found out that yati is currently taking occupational safety health course, 4 months. Class on weekdays, weekend balik UPM, class untuk her masters. Yang comelnya, yati sama kelas dengan cousin ktorang, mok ma. Dahlah dalam kelas duduk sekali, depan sekali 😂
Sebab abang aku dah officer, senanglah kakak aku nak masuk bidang OSH bila dah habis belajar nanti.
Sometimes, i do jealous of other people, sibukkan diri tahap gaban despite their pack schedule. When you’re busy, sedikitlah masa untuk berlagha.
Dan lagi insan yang buat aku kagum sangat, are my parents. Since past few years, weekend je pergi kelas mengaji kat masjid negeri. Under MUIP. That’s why pattern of my family changed.. dulu we used to spend our weekend kat kedai buku pollpular. But now, no longer.
After ayah cmpleted diploma dulu, azam ayah untuk belajar tak terhenti lagi. ayah selalu ceritakan lepas dah kahwin, ayang sambung degree kat UITM Jengka. It was a rough times, back then. Alhamdulillah, ayah made it into his degree in business studies.
Abang chor also planned to pursue his master studies dalam OSH.. I remember when he completed his diploma, he was kinda unstable. but i see his hardwork. he masuk kursus tu, ini, kena hantar kerja contract ke Penang bagai.. Gambang..Muadzam..Johor. Tapi among our siblings, dialah paling banyak $$
Lepas raya nanti, yah ada exam.. Cert for accountancy something like that, aku tak bertanya lanjut pun, segan. Just wanna say, my parents, my siblings, are my ultimate idols..
The thing is, im kinda miss my abang. Last time jumpa dia last november, he’s seem to be struggling very hard. What’s app pun lambat reply. Nanti ye sambung master, pjj.. makin susahlah aku nak jumpa dia. Dia ni dah nak masuk 3 series.. aku harap dia tak lupa untuk kahwin.. Bestnya kalau ada anak buah lagi..
Ans i'm missing my adik.. doakan my adik pass with flying colours for her foundation in law exam.. and dapat masuk Uni yang dia harapkan untuk sambung law degree.. Allahumma amiin..
Unshakeable
“Sha.. my heart shattered into pieces..”
As we were walking from hospital, after done with exam last week. It was raining.. alang-alang hujan.. berdoalah..
“Wani.. wani’s heart shattered into pieces, sy dah jadi debu, wani..”
We tried out best, study groups each alternate days.. but when you got specialist for your long case.. you are dead meat.. when you did your job.. as best as you could.., i am still, belajar untuk serahkan segalanya pada tuhan. Kekuasaan Tuhan tu, melebihi segala-galanya. i believe in that.
Betullah kata orang, clinical years is where life gonna torture you in and out, no wonder depression among medical students is not uncommon. I miss those days, when im aiming for distinction.. but now, everyone including me, is aiming for the mere pass. Mohon doakan Aisha🌞
“Shah, can we go out after sending off farahin? Sy ajak wan keluar makan..” said wani
“Sure.. kita pergi kubah ria nak?”
Few weeks back, wani cried, because she felt she lost her friends.. it is me, and wan.. because wan dah berbaik dengan 'kawan' dia, so she felt left behind. While Im in other group.. she felt lonely..
There are times, when we dont feel like ourselves, being away from home, assignments every week, bed side teachings everyday, kat hospital, kena marah dengan specialist, exhausted yeah.. trying my best untuk biasakan.. betullah kata senior masa aku year 1 dulu.. 5 years of clinical sangat kejap.. and it is common to see people being extended, in this faculty.. few weeks of each postings.. rasa macam tak sempat nak belajar apa2 sangat.. bila masuk housemanship, struggle dia tak berhenti lagi.. housemandhip kata orang, multiple times harder because you work alone. No more friends berhuha macam zaman belajar.. Senang cerita 'hell' lah kaa orang.. Tapi I know, neraka Allah tu lagi scary..
Sebab tu, never force anyone into medicine.
3 of my friends.., they decided to tukar faculty because they knew, diorang boleh pergi jauh dengan minat mereka, dipenjarakan dalam sesuatu bidang yang bukan minat mereka, is killing them, slowly, everyday.. making they lost their smile..
Aku baru siap memasak sebenarnya. Now i miss Instagram.. sebab i used to post on recipes in my insta story..
Why deactivated Insta, sha?
Sebab i see that Instagram brings more harm than good..
Memang.. banyak je info we can learn from insta.. tazkirah ketuhanan, quotes best-best. Tapi the thing is, from instagram, you can see betapa alimnya seseorang itu, terserlah aib dia.. just how much you rspect a person, tapi you saw him 'like' an inappropriate picture.. wanita pulak tu. okeylah, ada orang lain yang buka ig dia.. bersangka baiklah. *tiba-tiba teringat kat kawan aku.. i was mad a him, tersalah kata. terus dia bagi ayat Quran. Surah Al-Hujurat, ayat 12. pergh, masa tu terbakar syaitan dikeliling aku. (actually it was my ego yang terbakar haha) * Facebook still a better place.. a tleast people dnt post inappropriate picture.. scholars are more in Facebook.
and.. i wanted untuk jaga hati. Daripada usha entah sesiapa entah. Daripada usha artis. Daripada usha benda tak sepatutnya. bukak discovery entah apa-apa keluar. Maksiat can happen, even when youre not out of your home. Betullah kata orang. zaman sekarang ni, nak dapat pahala senang je.. nak dapat dosa pun kacang putih saja ma..
and.. i realized, bila buka instagram, you tend to compare yourself with others.. When you started to compare with others, apa jadi? Kuranglah rasa bersyukur.. Kurang rasa nikmat yang Allah bagi.
Kak Shikin awal-awal lagi tegur.. kenapa takde profile picture.. kita nak deactivate ig kak shikin.. tapi dok tau mana nak tekannya. rupanya kena buka instagram kat web. kak shikin selalu tegur.. pasal dia suka baca blog aku. thank you kak shikin, for your support. please send my kisses to insyirah!
Pastu aku teringat.. event hari Sabtu ni, kitorang kena ada Instagram to vote on one competition.. haila.. later lah aku activate balik. hmm
Anyhow, mohon doakan sha dan rakan-rakan.. semoga result EOP O&G baik-baik aja.. and everyone could pass with flying colours.. insyaAllah, amiin. dan.. doakan sha dipermudahkan urusan jodoh.. semoga beroleh 'someone' yang boleh menyempurnakan iman. entahlah. bagi aku jodoh ni dah macam urusan hidup dan mati aku je.. it is like gali kubur sendiri. hm. tapi kalau tak jumpa jodoh lagi pun, it is a good thing.. because being protected from gali-ing own kubur.. #eh?
"Jodoh dan mati tu rahsia Allah, it is written, darling"
Love,
Sha,
As we were walking from hospital, after done with exam last week. It was raining.. alang-alang hujan.. berdoalah..
“Wani.. wani’s heart shattered into pieces, sy dah jadi debu, wani..”
We tried out best, study groups each alternate days.. but when you got specialist for your long case.. you are dead meat.. when you did your job.. as best as you could.., i am still, belajar untuk serahkan segalanya pada tuhan. Kekuasaan Tuhan tu, melebihi segala-galanya. i believe in that.
Betullah kata orang, clinical years is where life gonna torture you in and out, no wonder depression among medical students is not uncommon. I miss those days, when im aiming for distinction.. but now, everyone including me, is aiming for the mere pass. Mohon doakan Aisha🌞
“Shah, can we go out after sending off farahin? Sy ajak wan keluar makan..” said wani
“Sure.. kita pergi kubah ria nak?”
Few weeks back, wani cried, because she felt she lost her friends.. it is me, and wan.. because wan dah berbaik dengan 'kawan' dia, so she felt left behind. While Im in other group.. she felt lonely..
There are times, when we dont feel like ourselves, being away from home, assignments every week, bed side teachings everyday, kat hospital, kena marah dengan specialist, exhausted yeah.. trying my best untuk biasakan.. betullah kata senior masa aku year 1 dulu.. 5 years of clinical sangat kejap.. and it is common to see people being extended, in this faculty.. few weeks of each postings.. rasa macam tak sempat nak belajar apa2 sangat.. bila masuk housemanship, struggle dia tak berhenti lagi.. housemandhip kata orang, multiple times harder because you work alone. No more friends berhuha macam zaman belajar.. Senang cerita 'hell' lah kaa orang.. Tapi I know, neraka Allah tu lagi scary..
Sebab tu, never force anyone into medicine.
3 of my friends.., they decided to tukar faculty because they knew, diorang boleh pergi jauh dengan minat mereka, dipenjarakan dalam sesuatu bidang yang bukan minat mereka, is killing them, slowly, everyday.. making they lost their smile..
Aku baru siap memasak sebenarnya. Now i miss Instagram.. sebab i used to post on recipes in my insta story..
Why deactivated Insta, sha?
Sebab i see that Instagram brings more harm than good..
Memang.. banyak je info we can learn from insta.. tazkirah ketuhanan, quotes best-best. Tapi the thing is, from instagram, you can see betapa alimnya seseorang itu, terserlah aib dia.. just how much you rspect a person, tapi you saw him 'like' an inappropriate picture.. wanita pulak tu. okeylah, ada orang lain yang buka ig dia.. bersangka baiklah. *tiba-tiba teringat kat kawan aku.. i was mad a him, tersalah kata. terus dia bagi ayat Quran. Surah Al-Hujurat, ayat 12. pergh, masa tu terbakar syaitan dikeliling aku. (actually it was my ego yang terbakar haha) * Facebook still a better place.. a tleast people dnt post inappropriate picture.. scholars are more in Facebook.
and.. i wanted untuk jaga hati. Daripada usha entah sesiapa entah. Daripada usha artis. Daripada usha benda tak sepatutnya. bukak discovery entah apa-apa keluar. Maksiat can happen, even when youre not out of your home. Betullah kata orang. zaman sekarang ni, nak dapat pahala senang je.. nak dapat dosa pun kacang putih saja ma..
and.. i realized, bila buka instagram, you tend to compare yourself with others.. When you started to compare with others, apa jadi? Kuranglah rasa bersyukur.. Kurang rasa nikmat yang Allah bagi.
Kak Shikin awal-awal lagi tegur.. kenapa takde profile picture.. kita nak deactivate ig kak shikin.. tapi dok tau mana nak tekannya. rupanya kena buka instagram kat web. kak shikin selalu tegur.. pasal dia suka baca blog aku. thank you kak shikin, for your support. please send my kisses to insyirah!
Pastu aku teringat.. event hari Sabtu ni, kitorang kena ada Instagram to vote on one competition.. haila.. later lah aku activate balik. hmm
Anyhow, mohon doakan sha dan rakan-rakan.. semoga result EOP O&G baik-baik aja.. and everyone could pass with flying colours.. insyaAllah, amiin. dan.. doakan sha dipermudahkan urusan jodoh.. semoga beroleh 'someone' yang boleh menyempurnakan iman. entahlah. bagi aku jodoh ni dah macam urusan hidup dan mati aku je.. it is like gali kubur sendiri. hm. tapi kalau tak jumpa jodoh lagi pun, it is a good thing.. because being protected from gali-ing own kubur.. #eh?
"Jodoh dan mati tu rahsia Allah, it is written, darling"
Love,
Sha,
Wednesday, February 6, 2019
The Real Helper; Solat dan Sabar
Few weeks ago. Weekend macam biasa, petangnya ‘lepak’ kat
ward. Tengok-tengok case apa yang aku boleh study.
Masuk male ward, Lyn yang dah dekat ward mendekati aku. “Have interesting case
at bed 11.” Riak muka dia real excited menjadikan aku berganda excited. “what
case?” soal aku.
“Upper Gastrointestinal Hemorrhage secondary to suicidal
attempt. Dia minum detergent.” Okey.
Bagi aku, case sebegini, bukanlah melihat kepada ‘one of the
cause of UGIH is drinking detergent and bla bla’. No, no. Tapi, I’m scared that
if the patient turns out to be a Muslim, how I’m going to tackle this problem. How
I’m going to treat this patient holistically, cuba mengislahkannya,
menyantuninya, akan kenapa dia memilih jalan untuk menamatkan hidupnya. Someone
taught me,
Islam itu menyeluruh, bukanlah milik budak sekolah agama sahaja.
Bukanlah milik mereka yang hafiz, hafizah sahaja. Tak. Semua lapisan
background, bangsa kena mempraktikkan Islam. Nampakkan Islam tu dari semua
sudut bidang profesion, bukannya di kuliah-kuliah agama semata. Bukannya di
Fakulti Ulum Islamiyyah semata. Kalau bukan kita yang dilahirkan sebagai Islam
ini, memasukkan Islam dalam perkerjaan seharian kita, siapa lagi?
Ok. Back to the main idea.
Aku nak share satu catatan Hasan al-Banna.
“Wahai saudara sekalian,
Janganlah kamu berputus asa kerana putus asa itu bukan
akhlak orang Islam. Hakikat hari ini adalah impian semalam. Impian hari ini
bakal menjadi reality esok. Sesungguhnya ruang masa itu masa luas dan anasir
yang sejahtera itu masih kukuh dan gagah di dalam jiwa anak bangsamu yang
beriman biarpun kemusnahan begitu menggila. Yang lemah, tidak akan lemah sepanjang
hayatnya, dan yang gagah juga tidak akan gagah selama-lamanya.”
A lengthy nasihat, so apa yang kita boleh conclude?
Sebagaimana peritnya hidup harini ini, seteruk manapun kena
hentam dek lecturer, superior, sebagaimana sempitnya rezekimu pada harini,
jangan. Janganlah berhenti berharap. Dikecewakan sangat perit. Rasa macam a
whole world against you. Rasa macam Allah tak sayang.(Astargfirullahal adzim) Aku pernah alami
kekecewaan yang teruk. Masa tu aku baru 19 tahun. Surat tawaran dah terima, foundation
and interview passed with flying colours. Tinggal buat visa and fly je pergi
India. Berkali-kali aku questioned Allah, kenapa jalan hidup aku macam ni. At
the same time aku failed untuk mensyukuri segala nikmat yang Allah kurniakan
kat aku. Terlampau buta untuk bersyukur sebab tengok orang lain dikurniakan
nikmat lebih dari diri sendiri. Dan sekarang, aku sangat mensyukuri ketetapan
yang Allah atur. Allahuakbar.
“Allah give you more than what you’ve expected”
Allah SWT berfirman dalam surah al-Baqarah: 2:45-46:
“Dan mintalah pertolongan (kepada Allah) dengan sabar dan
solat. Dan sesungguhnya hal itu sangat berat, kecuali bagi orang-orang yang
khusyu’, (iaitu) orang-orang yang menyakini, bahawa mereka akan menemui Rabb
mereka dan bahawa mereka akan kembali kepada-Nya”
Ayat last tu sangat deep. Rasa macam nak menangis bila meniti baris-barisnya..
Anyhow.. Just put your trust in Allah. Tanpa berbelah bahagi. Biarpun
perit bagai dihiris pisau tajam.. Pecayalah, ada hikmahnya. Barangkali kau takkan dapat tahu hikmahnya didunia.. barangkali hikmahnya terungkai di akhirat kelak..
Love, Sha
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