Assalamualaikum.
O mighty Allah, please fulfill my dream to further studies in MBBS. Amiin. I dont mind if only in local universities.
Lately, berapa kali dah aku buat parents aku, especially my Dad disappointed of me, myself. Im sorry, Dad. Serious talk. And what goes around,comes around and what you give, you give back. We call that as hukum alam. Karma. or what-so-ever phrases that can replace them. And this happened to me.
After completing my giga big SPM examinations,and received the results of the examninations, I can't help it by hating my self. I cant believe what I scored in the examinations. I scored 9As and 1B. (6A+ 3A 1B+). I dont even have any A- and look, I got B+. Aint this crazy. I was like.. I screamed, yelled to myself, scolded myself for being this stupid. I cried cried and cried.
With this kind of result, surely, I can't apply for MARA and JPA. IBDP is gone. UK.
I applied some sort of foundation bodies, like Khazanah.. Yayasan Terengganu and all that I got is disappointment. How frustrated I was.
Yayasan Pahang do give opportunities and giving scholarship/eduloan for those who scored 8As and above. I didn't apply for it as, I'm not thinking of studying medicine in UIAM(the scholarship just for studying in UIAM) and I have no basic in Arabic which is totally like thrown me in CFS IIUM for two years. The duration of two years are like killing me. I wanted to studies in medicine or also known as MBBS/MD. The duration is quite long and... for me, tough. I have friends who are studying there and reading posts from student there, they said they really love to be a part of CFS IIUM but, it is quite competitive to studying in critical courses. Note that IIUM most of the student who got Founfation in Medicine mostly consist of SPM leavers who scored straight As and obtained many As.. I bet about 7 A+, maybe...
A couple weeks back, I joined a closed gorup Halatuju Pendidikan Selepas SPM. The issue is that... Yesterday and today, people keep of saying about furthering studies in Egypt. Deep in my heart I am disappointed and tired of myself.
After obtaining the result of SPM, I did whatever it takes to further studies in Egypt. I called, here, there, some foudations if there is any scholarship available. But hell, there's no. And when I was tired of accepting "No", "Sorry" or something like that, I stopped looking for scholarships. Nak pakai sponsorship pakailah tapi the point is, to negara orang. we dont know much and takde satu body pun yang betul2 akan jaga kita without a good foundation macam yayasan negeri, MARA and JPA. because dua agency ni kerajaan and yayasan under kerjaan negeri, okeyy. So aku sibukkan diri aku dengan driving class lessons.
Even though the driving class was held only about once or twice a week. I busied myself with some stupid things because of my fear of, my disappointment of well, there's not really much scholarship for me, as I got B+ for English. I did print out the form from Kemeterian Pengajian Tinggi, the form to apply for studying in Egypt, Cairo. Those clearance letter I had done filling them. But I din't sent. And yesterday, people in the group keep on talking about the results came out, I have the chance to further studies in Egypt and so on... Even more of then still has not scholarship, no loan applicable but, and most probably are self-spondored, deep in my heart... its killing me. And somehow, there's senior give some advices... motivates them that, dont worry, Egypt is okay, no corp d'etat, peace and so on, there got some organisation for malaysian students, you can apply for ZAKAT, foudation from your state, YAKIN, Yayasan Bank Rakyat and so on... most of them, saying about the chances who applied from KPT to further studies in Egypt are high and so on.
And I really, in a broken heart. O mighty Allah... I can't handle this feeling...
I want to be a part of Medical Students who are studying in Egypt. Seriously talk. So it's like...
totally...killing me.
Saturday, April 18, 2015
Thursday, February 26, 2015
LSPM : Rant on Tipikal Cerita Melayu
Assalamualaikum.
I'm lacking a good, restful sleep. There are so many things happened this days and most of them are about planning things that going to be done this Mac. And due to SPM results will be announced this Tuesday(3 days-to-go), i'm having palpitation whenever I think about. The thoughts that came were just so scary. "What if.. What if.." Aishah, you know that "what if" is Saytans great problem. But after I read Aiman Azlan's rant about SPM, the feeling was just like... Slowly becoming calm... He said that maybe SPM leavers are too worried as it is not about death, though. But I think... SPM is the things that... worth to worry about... And the consequuences that happens after received SPM results are just quite big. But hey. Not SPM results made you to become a doctor, engineer, scientist, or whatever career in this world. But Allah SWT. Trust Him, Sha. The Mighty One. You did all you can do, you tried your best, you struggle with all your heart. Just Du'a, and Tawakkal. Have faith on Him. The Great One.
To be continue
I'm lacking a good, restful sleep. There are so many things happened this days and most of them are about planning things that going to be done this Mac. And due to SPM results will be announced this Tuesday(3 days-to-go), i'm having palpitation whenever I think about. The thoughts that came were just so scary. "What if.. What if.." Aishah, you know that "what if" is Saytans great problem. But after I read Aiman Azlan's rant about SPM, the feeling was just like... Slowly becoming calm... He said that maybe SPM leavers are too worried as it is not about death, though. But I think... SPM is the things that... worth to worry about... And the consequuences that happens after received SPM results are just quite big. But hey. Not SPM results made you to become a doctor, engineer, scientist, or whatever career in this world. But Allah SWT. Trust Him, Sha. The Mighty One. You did all you can do, you tried your best, you struggle with all your heart. Just Du'a, and Tawakkal. Have faith on Him. The Great One.
To be continue
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
LSPM : Yee Sang dan Pusat Jagaan Kanak-kanak Rapha
Assalamualaikum.
Due to seek for some adventures, knowing more people, I signed up as volunteer for iM4U program that was held at Pusat Jagaan Kanan-Kanak Rapha to celebrate Chinese New Year with them. It was good to know some people, made the kids there happy and realized that I have to be more and more grateful to be able having my parents by my side. I just couldn't imagine how my life would be if they are gone. My life would miserable, for sure. Oh Mum and Dad. I love you guys so much.
So, as arranged, on 15 Feb, I went to the address that was told by an operator. Arrived there, all I can see are male, male and male. about ten guys and one girl. All that I know is all of them were from Politeknik while the one whose had a small chat with me was from UIA Gambang. Pharmacist-to-be.
After the girls including me were done with cooking dishes(actually we just pre-heat them, cooked some simple vegetables dishes and slices chicken meat and cooked rice), and the lion dancers done with ktung-ktang,ktung,ktang, the children whose were just got back from The Church were allowed to enter the 'food court'(Dewan Makan). So, I helped with the kids to get their seats, and gave them chopsticks for a ceremony that is related with a type of dishes called, Yee Sang.
First of all, the person who was in charged with iM4U from KL were Malays. 3 of them are female, two of the 3 boys I'm sure there are Malays, Islam but the other one I'm not sure. They bought food from restaurant that I don't know the source; whether Haram or Halal. Because it was totally like, Chinese food. Just imagine, daun salad dicelur dan dihidangkan dengan Oyster sauce. The sauce, I was totally not sure what was the ingredients to make the sauce. And hey, hey! Not only the sauce but also other 3 more dishes. I wanted to ask them but, it would be probably end up like, "Hey, I'm Islam too!" So Sis Ilham and I were decided to never touch Yee Sang and other dishes. We would just have KFC fried chicken that sponsored by sponsors, and rice only. Well, the rice for about 70 people were cooked by me, so I guaranteed that it is Halal. Well, what can you pun in rice cooker? Pork? Haha.
And, about the Yee Sang. It was prepared by Sis Ilham, the other two Malay sis from UIA that I couldn't remember their names and me. Four of us. The ingredients of Yee Sang was just like pickled vegetables, fried chruncy stuffs, few packets of hell I don't know what it is, two apples, a pear, oil and souce. The sauce and oil was packed in a typical plastic that are transparent. Besides, all those ingredients to make the Yee Sang was in a boxes(there are two boxes of Yee Sang for two large plate of Yee Sang) the boxes was like... No halal trademark, nothing written in English or Malay but only some Chinese word that is traditional Chinese. I can only read simple Chinese words!
So, during the ceremony of 'angkat Yee Sang tinggi-tinggi yang macam dalam TV tu' the kids took the plates and put Yee Sang on their plates, add rice and some other side dishes. Meanwhile, I went to busy myself by distributing plates and, I don't really remember what I did at the moment. Suddenly, the iM4U from KL staff called me. I think he's Malay by the way he called me and he speaks Bahasa Melayu fluently with me. He's about in twenties.
Awak, awak, mari sini.
I turned around just in case that I would not make myself ashamed if he was intend to call other people, not me.
Saya?
Ya,ya, awaklah.
I walked to him. I saw Sis Ilham was sitting behind him with....her hand that was holding chopsticks. And the chopsticks was like...
Awak dah rasa ke belum ni?
He gave me a pair of chopsticks. I was totally flabbergasted at the moment!
Belum, takpa, nanti saya rasa.
I was hoping he will say "Ok". And we know that it did not happened.
Tengok ni, Yee Sang ni ada, err.. sayur... ada carrot... anda buah... boleh makan.
I know what was in the Yee Sang because I prepared them!(note: different type of Yee Sang have different ingredients such as salmon fish) He tried to convince me but it wasn't convincing at all. All I want was to reject him. And again, we know that it did not happened.
We was surrounding by the kids and about 20 of adult that sponsored the kids' living expenses there and they were all chinese. There were some Malays but Malays doesn't matter. I dig my brain to find excuses so that I don't have to eat in front of him right away. But nothing crossed my mind! I know that I have to read the du'a of Nabi Sulaiman more often than I used to pray.
I took the chopsticks and took the pear. The pear was cut by me so, I have all the confident to eat the sliced pear.
Lah,, sikitnya makan? Ambillah banyak sikit. Reti guna chopstick tak?
I looked at him in disbelieving... I was from Chinese school, remember? Of course I used to use chopsticks. So I closed my eyes and grab quite lot of stuffs in my chopsticks including pickled carrots. I looked at the carrots and some other pickled vegetables that was stains with unknown sauce. Then, sense got into myself. I took quite many. So I put it back, let it fall and grabbed some with small quantity and it just like... suddenly it was in my mouth. I smiled at him and walked away from him. The taste of sauce got into my taste bud. I walked faster to a roll of tissues and sat down beside Sis Ilham. I turned around where no one behind me and everything in my mouth was already in the tissue. Few seconds later I was in front of the sink. Spitted out everything out of my mouth. I couldn't believe myself that I didn't telan air liur for about 2 minutes. It tasted totally disgusting. I did not used with the taste. the taste was like... Oh my. Oh Chinese who is reading this, no offense, please. it just same as the way when you said you hate tart nenas. A chinese girl said it taste like poo.
Moral of the story... In a Chinese community places and surrounding with syubhah food, a Muslim should just say, "I'm fasting".
#I really hope that the iM4U staff really bought Yee Sang sauce that are from Halal restaurant or Chinese-Muslims restaurant... I really hope so.
Due to seek for some adventures, knowing more people, I signed up as volunteer for iM4U program that was held at Pusat Jagaan Kanan-Kanak Rapha to celebrate Chinese New Year with them. It was good to know some people, made the kids there happy and realized that I have to be more and more grateful to be able having my parents by my side. I just couldn't imagine how my life would be if they are gone. My life would miserable, for sure. Oh Mum and Dad. I love you guys so much.
So, as arranged, on 15 Feb, I went to the address that was told by an operator. Arrived there, all I can see are male, male and male. about ten guys and one girl. All that I know is all of them were from Politeknik while the one whose had a small chat with me was from UIA Gambang. Pharmacist-to-be.
After the girls including me were done with cooking dishes(actually we just pre-heat them, cooked some simple vegetables dishes and slices chicken meat and cooked rice), and the lion dancers done with ktung-ktang,ktung,ktang, the children whose were just got back from The Church were allowed to enter the 'food court'(Dewan Makan). So, I helped with the kids to get their seats, and gave them chopsticks for a ceremony that is related with a type of dishes called, Yee Sang.
First of all, the person who was in charged with iM4U from KL were Malays. 3 of them are female, two of the 3 boys I'm sure there are Malays, Islam but the other one I'm not sure. They bought food from restaurant that I don't know the source; whether Haram or Halal. Because it was totally like, Chinese food. Just imagine, daun salad dicelur dan dihidangkan dengan Oyster sauce. The sauce, I was totally not sure what was the ingredients to make the sauce. And hey, hey! Not only the sauce but also other 3 more dishes. I wanted to ask them but, it would be probably end up like, "Hey, I'm Islam too!" So Sis Ilham and I were decided to never touch Yee Sang and other dishes. We would just have KFC fried chicken that sponsored by sponsors, and rice only. Well, the rice for about 70 people were cooked by me, so I guaranteed that it is Halal. Well, what can you pun in rice cooker? Pork? Haha.
And, about the Yee Sang. It was prepared by Sis Ilham, the other two Malay sis from UIA that I couldn't remember their names and me. Four of us. The ingredients of Yee Sang was just like pickled vegetables, fried chruncy stuffs, few packets of hell I don't know what it is, two apples, a pear, oil and souce. The sauce and oil was packed in a typical plastic that are transparent. Besides, all those ingredients to make the Yee Sang was in a boxes(there are two boxes of Yee Sang for two large plate of Yee Sang) the boxes was like... No halal trademark, nothing written in English or Malay but only some Chinese word that is traditional Chinese. I can only read simple Chinese words!
So, during the ceremony of 'angkat Yee Sang tinggi-tinggi yang macam dalam TV tu' the kids took the plates and put Yee Sang on their plates, add rice and some other side dishes. Meanwhile, I went to busy myself by distributing plates and, I don't really remember what I did at the moment. Suddenly, the iM4U from KL staff called me. I think he's Malay by the way he called me and he speaks Bahasa Melayu fluently with me. He's about in twenties.
Awak, awak, mari sini.
I turned around just in case that I would not make myself ashamed if he was intend to call other people, not me.
Saya?
Ya,ya, awaklah.
I walked to him. I saw Sis Ilham was sitting behind him with....her hand that was holding chopsticks. And the chopsticks was like...
Awak dah rasa ke belum ni?
He gave me a pair of chopsticks. I was totally flabbergasted at the moment!
Belum, takpa, nanti saya rasa.
I was hoping he will say "Ok". And we know that it did not happened.
Tengok ni, Yee Sang ni ada, err.. sayur... ada carrot... anda buah... boleh makan.
I know what was in the Yee Sang because I prepared them!(note: different type of Yee Sang have different ingredients such as salmon fish) He tried to convince me but it wasn't convincing at all. All I want was to reject him. And again, we know that it did not happened.
We was surrounding by the kids and about 20 of adult that sponsored the kids' living expenses there and they were all chinese. There were some Malays but Malays doesn't matter. I dig my brain to find excuses so that I don't have to eat in front of him right away. But nothing crossed my mind! I know that I have to read the du'a of Nabi Sulaiman more often than I used to pray.
I took the chopsticks and took the pear. The pear was cut by me so, I have all the confident to eat the sliced pear.
Lah,, sikitnya makan? Ambillah banyak sikit. Reti guna chopstick tak?
I looked at him in disbelieving... I was from Chinese school, remember? Of course I used to use chopsticks. So I closed my eyes and grab quite lot of stuffs in my chopsticks including pickled carrots. I looked at the carrots and some other pickled vegetables that was stains with unknown sauce. Then, sense got into myself. I took quite many. So I put it back, let it fall and grabbed some with small quantity and it just like... suddenly it was in my mouth. I smiled at him and walked away from him. The taste of sauce got into my taste bud. I walked faster to a roll of tissues and sat down beside Sis Ilham. I turned around where no one behind me and everything in my mouth was already in the tissue. Few seconds later I was in front of the sink. Spitted out everything out of my mouth. I couldn't believe myself that I didn't telan air liur for about 2 minutes. It tasted totally disgusting. I did not used with the taste. the taste was like... Oh my. Oh Chinese who is reading this, no offense, please. it just same as the way when you said you hate tart nenas. A chinese girl said it taste like poo.
Moral of the story... In a Chinese community places and surrounding with syubhah food, a Muslim should just say, "I'm fasting".
#I really hope that the iM4U staff really bought Yee Sang sauce that are from Halal restaurant or Chinese-Muslims restaurant... I really hope so.
Saturday, February 14, 2015
LSPM: Rant on Kellie's Castle, Batu Gajah, Perak
Assalamualaikum.
p/s: My older Sister, Farah laughed when I said Batu Gajah. She thought I was mencarut as she never heard and never know that there's place in the Earth called Batu Gajah.
On 7th February which is a week ago, my family consist of my parents, little sister, Granny and I went to Ipoh Perak for my EduCamp at UTP and we paid a visit to my Mum's eldest Sister who is currently living in Ipoh Perak. It was a short trip where we only spent two days there including traveling hours. Can you believe how short the trip was as traveling from Kuantan to Tronoh is about 7 hours?
Well, as the trip is not for holiday, suddenly my sister kept talking about Kelly Kelly and I wasn't heard before - what the hell is that?
And again, suddenly when my parents done fetching me at UTP after the educamp was done, she started her stomachache. I wasn't wether it was seriously period pain or "something". And when we arrived at Mak Long's house for lunch, she still, with her stomachache. But then, she can still eat couple number of fried chicken. Haha. So, seeing that my sister was ill, Dad decided to go to Kellie's Castle that is located in Batu Gajah; where we took an exit from Taman Sri Desa to the Highway, and further driving until we reached Batu Gajah.
When we was there, it was about 3 o'clock. Can you imagine how hot was that moment? Well, Batu Gajah is Perak, further far away from East Penisular (Pahang and Terengganu is having a cold temperature and currently windy )
We went there and go to the ticket counter.
RM4 untuk warga emas
RM5 untuk orand dewasa 12>
We started to walk around the castle, it is huge and, well, fantastic. My enthusiasm to explore the castle increased 85% from 60%(because of the weather and tiredness after the educamp. Testing your brain is seem to make you tired morecompare to physically tested. Trust me. I'm an engineer).
And of course, we were free to take pictures. So we took atleast thousands of pictures to be saved as memories. Momentos.
The castle is know as hunted Castle and 'hunted' made this castle to be more popular. And there is load and lots of sort of information that are informative about Kellie's family, assets, his remaining in London, his wealthiness, what happened when he died, about Buddhist, his religion, Catholic, wife, rooms and etc.You will find out that this 3-4 floor castle is spectacular, especially regarding it' rooms, and some sort of hidden rooms for his children and etc. And of course, about the history in Tanah Melayu. They owned about THREE THOUSAND hectars of land, y'know...
Then,
Let's scroll down and move on with the pictures...!
p/s: My older Sister, Farah laughed when I said Batu Gajah. She thought I was mencarut as she never heard and never know that there's place in the Earth called Batu Gajah.
On 7th February which is a week ago, my family consist of my parents, little sister, Granny and I went to Ipoh Perak for my EduCamp at UTP and we paid a visit to my Mum's eldest Sister who is currently living in Ipoh Perak. It was a short trip where we only spent two days there including traveling hours. Can you believe how short the trip was as traveling from Kuantan to Tronoh is about 7 hours?
Well, as the trip is not for holiday, suddenly my sister kept talking about Kelly Kelly and I wasn't heard before - what the hell is that?
And again, suddenly when my parents done fetching me at UTP after the educamp was done, she started her stomachache. I wasn't wether it was seriously period pain or "something". And when we arrived at Mak Long's house for lunch, she still, with her stomachache. But then, she can still eat couple number of fried chicken. Haha. So, seeing that my sister was ill, Dad decided to go to Kellie's Castle that is located in Batu Gajah; where we took an exit from Taman Sri Desa to the Highway, and further driving until we reached Batu Gajah.
When we was there, it was about 3 o'clock. Can you imagine how hot was that moment? Well, Batu Gajah is Perak, further far away from East Penisular (Pahang and Terengganu is having a cold temperature and currently windy )
We went there and go to the ticket counter.
RM4 untuk warga emas
RM5 untuk orand dewasa 12>
We started to walk around the castle, it is huge and, well, fantastic. My enthusiasm to explore the castle increased 85% from 60%(because of the weather and tiredness after the educamp. Testing your brain is seem to make you tired morecompare to physically tested. Trust me. I'm an engineer).
And of course, we were free to take pictures. So we took atleast thousands of pictures to be saved as memories. Momentos.
The castle is know as hunted Castle and 'hunted' made this castle to be more popular. And there is load and lots of sort of information that are informative about Kellie's family, assets, his remaining in London, his wealthiness, what happened when he died, about Buddhist, his religion, Catholic, wife, rooms and etc.You will find out that this 3-4 floor castle is spectacular, especially regarding it' rooms, and some sort of hidden rooms for his children and etc. And of course, about the history in Tanah Melayu. They owned about THREE THOUSAND hectars of land, y'know...
Then,
Let's scroll down and move on with the pictures...!
 |
| Me at the stairs. Opposite with Kandang Kuda. |
 |
| Little Sis. |
 |
| Some of left err... buildings? |
 |
| This castle have stairs that directly from third-floor-master-bedroom to outside of the house? Yeah. Amazing. |
 |
| My sis and I |
 |
| View from exit of the castle |
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